fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
