Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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