Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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