We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
that is very illegal...i love you.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
