dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
