idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize