I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize