I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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