when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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