This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
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