Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
