No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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