wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
