we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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