You're completely useless in the revolution.
My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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