I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
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