? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Randomize
