can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
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