normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
