The maid of honor just puked.
no you cant smoke seaweed
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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