I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
