come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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