fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
