went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
