did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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