a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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