my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
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