Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Such a big mess for such a small penis
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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