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• (212): View more from New York

  brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp

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• (207): View more from Maine

  I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (605): View more from South Dakota

  We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.

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• (916): View more from California

  I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk

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• (254): View more from Texas

  Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (315): View more from New York

  how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!

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• (606): View more from Kentucky

  Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober

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• (402): View more from Nebraska

  I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!

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