she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
