I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
