So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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