seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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