when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
25 Times Terrible Advice Was Given To A Teenager
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.