Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with