We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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