Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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