is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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