would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
