When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
