found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
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