but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
