The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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