love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Randomize
