Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
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I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
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I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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