hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
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We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
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I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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