While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
