I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
