im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
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