You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
we should paint friendship bongs
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
