I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
