GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
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Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
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I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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